Eminem – Tone Deaf lyrics

[Intro]
Yeah, I’m sorry (Huh?)
What did you say?
Oh, I can’t hear you
I have an ear infucktion and I cunt finger it out (Out, haha)
(I need auto tune)
Yeah

[Verse 1]

It’s my alter-ego’s fault, these evil thoughts can be so dark

Cerebral palsy, three Zolofts

I eat those off to Rico Suave, look it up

Cadillac with a ladder rack in the back, with a cracked axel

A backpack full of Paxil

A black satchel, a nap sack and a flask full of ‘gnac and Jack Daniels

Girl, let’s go back, back to my castle (Yeah)

I don’t wanna hassle you, Alexandra

But my dick’s an acronym ’cause it stands for you (Oh)

You, wait, Alexandra who? (Damn)

All I know is Friday, I met you (What?)

Saturday, I’ll probably forget you

Guess that’s what the Molly and X do (What the fuck?)

‘Cause who the fuck am I laying next to? (Heh)

But ever sincе D-Nice “To tha Rescue”

Feel a frеsh crew (Uh), been a lab rat (Yeah)

From a test tube (Uh), I’m goin’ in like the red roof (Red Roof Inn)

You don’t like it, eat a cock ’til your jaw breaks

Call it caught between a rock and a hard place

Like a sasquatch in a crawlspace

‘Cause you’re watching your heart race like you’re Scarface

In a car chase with the cops or an arcade

Stuck inside of a Mario Kart race, stuck in saw blades

At a stop and a start pace

What I’m tryin’ to say is, I’m drivin’ ’em all crazy

[Chorus]

I can’t understand a word you say (I’m tone deaf)

I think this way I prefer to stay (I’m tone deaf)

I won’t stop even when my hair turns grey (I’m tone deaf)

‘Cause they won’t stop until they cancel me (Yeah, yeah)

[Verse 2]

I see the rap game then attack the verses (Uh)

Turn into a graveyard packed with hearses (Yeah)

Just like your funeral, I’m at your service (What?)

Pockets on stuffed like a taxidermist (Woo)

Just landed in Los Angeles when this chick Angela and her grandmother in a tan

Colored van pulled up with a hand full of Xans

And a substantial amount of ganja, just to ask what my

Plans for the night are (Yeah)

I said sneakin’ to the Sleep Inn for the weekend and pretend it’s a five star

Yeah, I leap into the deep end of the pool, I can show you where the dives are (Get it?)

We don’t even gotta drive far

I know this spot that is so live, but I’m tryna get some head first, like a nose dive (Haha)

So many side chicks, can’t decide which to slide with and which should I ditch

So when it comes to ass, bitch, I get behind like the Heimlich (Yeah)

Had one chick who liked to flip sometimes on some switchin’ sides shit

Pushed her out the side, kicked, then I flipped

The lil’ white bitch off like a light switch (Bitch)

It’s okay not to like my shit

Everything’s fine, drink your wine, bitch

And get offline, quit whinin’, this is just a rhyme, bitch

But ask me, will I stick to my guns like adhesive tape?

Does Bill Cosby sedate once he treats the cheesecake and the decent steak?

You think gettin’ rid of me’s a piece of cake?

I’m harder than findin’ Harvey Weinstein a date (Haha)

And that’s why they say I got more lines than Black Friday

So save that shit for the damn library (Shh)

You heard of Kris Kristofferson? (Yeah) Well, I am piss piss off’ed-eson (Oh)

Paul’s askin’ for Christmas off again

I said, “No,” then I spit this song for him, it goes:

[Chorus]

I can’t understand a word you say (I’m tone deaf)

I think this way I prefer to stay (I’m tone deaf)

I won’t stop even when my hair turns grey (I’m tone deaf)

‘Cause they won’t stop until they cancel me (Yeah, yeah, yeah)

[Verse 3]

Bitch, I can make an orange rhyme with banana, oranana

Eating pork rinds, sword fightin’ in pajamas

At the crib, playin’ Fortnite wit’ your grandma

But I’m more like I’m 4’5″ with the grammar

Bitch, ’bout to show you why your five favorite rappers, can’t touch this

But before I get the hammer, I should warn you I’m Thor-like in this manner

But the day I lose sleep over you critiquin’ me or

I ever let you cocksuckers eat at me

I’d need to be a motherfuckin’ pizzeria, but you ain’t gettin’ no cheese from me

I went from Lil’ Ceasers, BLT-ses, grilled cheeses

Bein’ dirt poor to filthy rich, I’m still me, bitch

Like a realtor, it’s realty, bitch (Real talk)

Aftermath, bitch, whole camp’s lit

We put out fire, Dre stamps it

With my cohorts, hit up Bogart

Yeah, got your whole squad yellin’, “Oh, God”

Here comes Marshall, with no holds barred

Bitch, I’m a hurricane, you’re a blow hard

Like your old broad, she full of semen, like the coast guard

And life’s been pretty good to me so far, for the most part

Had a couple of run-in’s with popo, caught

A couple assault charges, got a few priors like crowbars

Which is so odd ’cause I’m forty-eight now

That 5-0’s startin’ to creep up on me like a patrol car

I’ll be an old fart, but you don’t want no part, so bitch, don’t start

Simmer down, compose yourself, Mozart

I ain’t went nowhere, call me coleslaw

‘Cause I’m out for the cabbage and I’m so raw

And if time is money, you have no clocks

And any folk caught within close proximity’s gettin’ Colt cocked

My enemies I’m a chimney give me the smoke, opps

And R.I.P. to King Von, and it don’t stop, and I know not

What the fuck you say? I told y’all, it ain’t me, it’s my alter-ego’s fault

But if y’all wanna cancel me, no prob’

I’ll tell you the same thing I told Paul

[Chorus]

I can’t understand a word you say (I’m tone deaf)

I think this way I prefer to stay (I’m tone deaf)

I won’t stop even when my hair turns grey (I’m tone deaf)

‘Cause they won’t stop until they cancel me (I’m tone deaf)

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