John Cooper Clarke – Bongo’s Trousers lyrics

Who stole Bongo’s trousers?
And his ten-gallon stetson hat
He can’t save the fucking planet
Improperly dressed like that
Who stole Bongo’s trousers?
Can he get’em back
He’s tryin to save the fuckin’ planet
(OTHER VERSION: To do some good in the world)
That’s no way to act

Who stole Bongo’s trousers?

Was it Posh or Beck?

He can’t admire the fucking pope

Without his fucking keks

World politics is a tough enough gig

Without this kind of shit

He’ll give you some other stuff

If you give him back his kit

Yes who stole that stetson hat

Who stole those leather strides

And those Vegas-period Elvis shades

With the gold meccano sides

Trousers shades

Eighty-pint Stetson

Can he have them back?

He’s cutting a deal about third-world debt (… and poverty and that)

Please cut him some slack

He does not have to care so much

He’s alright as he is

It’s rare to find such selflessness

Especially in The Biz

Who stole Bongo’s trousers?

They must be fucking sick

Was it some sinister cunt

Or who was that chick?

She said her name was Bernadette

But then she would say that

Anything to get those trousers

Sunglasses and hat

Who stole Bongo’s trousers?

And his million-dollar shades?

Was it the CIA

Or the middle-european chambermaids

(OTHER VERSION: he says filippino chambermaids)

Whoever stole Bongo’s trousers

The wraparounds an’ hat

Deserves to get their fingers’ broke

And that’s the end of that

I’d kick them up the holiday money

(OTHER VERSION:I’d send in the UN troops… all systems go)

Should they ever show up

Coz Bongo minus trousers

I would not want to know

(OTHER VERSION: Equals: I don’t wanna know)

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